Posted in poems

eeek…. a poem!!!

i love to write ~ about anything i think i know or know i love, just being able to succinctly communicate a thought brings some silly satisfaction ~ in a letter, or a journal, a memo or a professional document, pretty much anything….but poetry?

HECK. NO.

i never understood the appeal… and even if i did, i’ve had no interest in “putting myself out there” like that.

until i did ~ accidentally ~ not kidding

perhaps it was too much Seuss as a kid

but there is was, scribbled out on little pieces of note paper all over my bed, a little stream of thought that ran through my mind with a certain rhythm and rhyme… and somehow, it just said what i was feeling leaving me strangely relieved

like i’d had a good cry ~ as if that’s not an oxymoron…

several poems later, a sister in Christ, whom i have never met (Beth Moore), suggested that poetry is often born from deep emotion or turmoil… so ya…”out there”, in a BIG way (at least to me ;p)

articulating frustrations, expressing joy or grief, finding a place to rest my mind when my emotions won’t sleep, poems seem to put parameters on my scrambled thoughts, the rhythm offering a soothing cadence and the completion quieting the competing emotions…

and maybe most of what i write will only ever impact me…. but maybe God’s way of helping me articulate what churns in my soul could benefit another…

so….. “out there” it is!!

Posted in discipleship, poems

when she stumbles…

a battle rages for her soul
   the siren call
         of this world would pull

her in to its grip
   with persuasive lies
until bit by bit
   inside
     she dies 

she has stumbled
   don’t let her fall
Your voice she hears
    she feels so small

in fear and panic
   she glances up
and grabs a glimpse
   of light and hope 

but at her heals
   a lion roars
emotions surge
  inside
     she’s torn

between surrenders
   to right or wrong
between her longings
   of flesh or soul 

torn between
   the desperate need
for true healing
   not just relief 

the battle rages
   in her mind
from her flesh
   fueled by pride 

does she still believe
  that she knows best
or is she ready
   to truly rest 

safe in Your hands
   with her heavy load
will she walk
   that narrow road

not just her Savior
   will she call You Lord
will she learn to trust
   and surrender more 

to You each day
     as she presses on
in her brightest days
   in her nights so long 

will she embrace this life
     Your way
and live surrendered
   even in
       the haze 

this is a battle
   not of flesh nor bone
a battle to save
   one of Your own

oh help us, Lord,
   to lead and trust
to be prepared
   to do what we must

You love her more
  than we ever could
so we lift her to You
   as we know we should

we trust You in
   our pain and fear
we praise you in
   our hurt and tears 

please heal our hearts
   protect our minds
give us Your wisdom
   help us trust Your time 

we raise her up
   in Your holy name
O Jesus, Lord,
   in Your name, we pray…..

Be sober-minded; be watchful, your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.  1 Peter 5:8

“We destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God, and take every thought captive to obey Christ...”  2 Corinthians 10:5

For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places.    Ephesians 6:12

All that the Father gives Me will come to me, and whoever comes to Me I will not cast out. For I have come down from heaven, not to do My own will but the will of Him who sent Me, that I should lose nothing of all that He has given Me, but raise it upon the last day.                         John 6:37-39

Posted in devotion, poems

i come to You…

i come to You to soothe my pain
to dry my tears and take my shame

i come to You to calm my fears
to listen when nobody hears

i come to You to guide my steps
to hold my hand when troubles get

a hold of me and blind my eyes
and drown the truth with clever lies

i come to You for me it’s true
but also so i’ll know you too

i come to you and seek Your face
to see Your glory and feel Your grace

i come to hear Your gentle voice
that whispers truth in all the noise

i come to sit in the wonder of
the One with power and perfect love

my shelter and my hiding place
i come to You, my source of strength

for all of this and so much more
i’ll come to you forever more

Posted in poems

as the paper meets the ink…

exposing pieces of my heart
sharing what i think
a piece of me i soon lay bare
as the paper meets the ink

the scraping sounds across the page
dims the uninvited voice
of the editor & judge in me
who questions every choice

sorting out my deepest thoughts
a vulnerable place to be
revealing fear i’d rather hide
as the paper meets the ink

flowing from my pen some days
i write before i know
where the words will take me
~where my thoughts will go

surrendered to the flow of thought
and each discovery
i have found a freedom
as the paper meets the ink

Posted in encouragement, poems

my littles are big!

IMG_0001my littles are big
but only moments ago
I nestled them under my chin
my littles are big
but just yesterday
I marveled at their first grin

the days flew by
though I tried to hold tight
and treasure each mark as they grew
these sweet moments in life 
I can honestly say
from the beginning I always knew

to love every moment
even long, tired days
of laundry and homework
the joy with the pain

my little are big!
and OH how I miss
those soft little cheeks
messy hands
sticky kiss

but my little ARE big
and what a blessing I know
to see who they’ve become
as I’ve watched them grow

A bittersweet gift to long for those days
only missing them because
I had them
so I will remember, but live here and now
because I still know now
what I knew then

to treasure these gifts
don’t lose sight in the crazy
of all that comes with what we’re given
enjoy beauty in chaos and never forget
to treasure these slices of heaven

my littles are big and now moving on
having littles of their own
and oh what a treasure
soft cheeks, sticky kisses
this grammy is grateful to know

There are times I am almost completely overwhelmed by what I miss, but then I have no choice but to realize the irony, I couldn’t long to return to something I’d never had.  To have had such a treasure, to have been able to have that season of life, was such an overwhelming gift ~ a gift I always knew was just for a season ~I find that I find deeper understanding to this whole idea of “bittersweet”  ❤

If you are in the crazy fun days of little kids, little sleep and lots of stuff to do, just hang on tight, don’t lose the love under the pile of laundry, it will all be behind you all too soon!!  But no worries, if you keep looking, new treasures are likely just around the corner!

“Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change”  James 1:17

Posted in poems

no end…

there is no end to the string of pain
that those i love endure
health and finance, bad choices and strife
one ends, but then there’s more

there is no end to the suffering
illness, even loss of life
lies, betrayal, selfish ways
cruel men who leave their wife

there is no end to the poverty
and corruption as this world decays
no end to hate and anger
no end to those going astray 

           unless you know

there is no end to my Father’s love
of the pain He feels for me
no end to the mercy and grace He gave
when HIs Son was nailed to that tree

there will be no end to our joy and  wonder
when He takes away our tears
when we join Him in eternity
when it’s forever, not just years

no end to the glorious worship of
the One who gave me life
so knowing this I’ll live this day
with peace, even joy, amidst strife

“And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”     Philippians 4:7

We live in a world corrupted by sin, ensnared by its power, broken by its lies ~ but, though through one man sin was brought in to this world, through another, it and death have been defeated. “For God so loved this world, He gave His only Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have eternal life”  John 3:16

there is no end to my fellowship with God because I am His in Christ

there is no end to suffering and separation from God if I were not

Posted in poems

distractions

You know the chaos in my heart
You know the trials of my life
You know the sins still not confessed
You know the source of all this strife

impatience reigns in my weary soul
frustration has a voice
disappointment speaks her mind so loud
i’m distracted by this noise

search my heart and reveal to me
the ugly i need to see
hold my hand as i pour out
every sinful piece of me

fill me with Your quiet strength
pour in to me again
lead me in Your light and truth
Your freedom I can claim

let me hear Your still, small voice
as I search Your loving Word
transform my soul as i obey
so your Truth can truly be heard

not in what i say, but who i am
transformed, I’ve been redeemed 
You have a plan to use me so
Your glory can be seen

the chaos calm, the trials dim
with You my worries fade
my heart is free, down on my knees
this time, i wouldn’t  trade

to sit with You in quiet peace
and feel Your presence near
to know that in the worst of trials
i can trust You and not fear

show me now, just my next step
as i open up Your word
prepare me so they see You
in this lonely broken world

Posted in poems

unworthy treasure

unworthy but not worthless
my freedom isn’t free
eternal life, i could not earn
the price He paid for me

the gift of true salvation
from consequence and claim
no longer slave to sin and death
i live to praise His name

unworthy but not worthless
a treasure bought with blood
i live to show the world my God
of sovereign, perfect love

excluded not exclusive
set apart, not set above
chosen for a purpose
this aching world needs love

love those who are against me
do good to those who hate
as long as God will give them breath
i know it’s not too late

for the power of my Savior
to claim their hearts and mind
so i let Him love them through me
so one day they too may find

they’re unworthy but not worthless
a treasure bought with blood
a priceless price was paid for them
they too may know this love